Friday, November 20, 2009

Gremlins


Mogwais aren't supposed to eat after midnight or else they'll turn into gremlins. And the movie shows clearly that mogwais can eat at 11:59 pm with no problem, so long as they finish up by midnight.

Everyone I know has wondered how long mogwais have to wait until they can eat again in the morning. But the more important question is how they're affected by daylight savings and time zones. Do they set their clocks back? What if a mogwai starts eating on a plane that takes off at 11:30 pm heading west from Atlanta to San Diego and continues eating for an hour? By the time midnight in Atlanta comes around, that mogwai is in central time zone.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

Drinkability


Bud Light's current advertising campaign is DRINKABILITY, clearly establishing that Bud Light:

1) Is a liquid.
2) Is not poison.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Agricultural News

Ahh yes, September is just around the corner. And a rainy spring season should yield one of the most bountiful crunchberry harvests in years.

Thursday, August 13, 2009

Question

Question: What do you get when you combine Christian Bale with Corey Feldman?



Answer: Eric Bana

Just try and tell me you don't see it.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

New Favorite Band

Does anyone know if these guys are touring this summer? They bring the raw energy. Word.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Feet and Impotence

Have you seen this ad on the subway?


Despite the lame attempt to make it look like it's three ads, they're not fooling anyone.

Seriously? One impotence ad surrounded by two ads for the same foot doctor? And three ads that are always in the same order?

Anyways, yes it's true. The same place that's gonna fix your erection can also heal your bunions.

Saturday, June 13, 2009

16 and Pregnant


Thanks to MTV, who is making it easier than ever for 16-year-old girls who are looking for a way to get famous.

Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Did You Know?

Of all the players on the Buffalo Bills, not a single one of them is named Bill.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Craigs List

With everyone talking about these Craigs lists all the time I just had to get in on the action. Here's mine...


1. Craig Ferguson
2. Craig T. Nelson
3. Larry Craig
4. Daniel Craig
5. Craig Kilborn
6. Jenny Craig

Wednesday, April 15, 2009

16 Again

I just thought of the greatest idea for a movie: 16 Again.

Monday, March 23, 2009

Keeping Things Straight - Part II

Am I the only one who gets confused between Willie Mays and Billy Mays?

Thursday, March 12, 2009

Frosted Mini Wheats


I saw an ad for Frosted Mini Wheats tonight that cited scientific data that doctors recommend children eat Frosted Mini Wheats for breakfast over not having breakfast at all. I don't have a problem with that claim, I just think that they're setting the bar really low. Right? I mean, they're saying that given the choice between eating Frosted Mini Wheats in the morning or not eating anything at all and thereby starving your body of any necessary sustenance, then yes, they recommend eating food.

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Private Eyes

I know a lot of people prefer Every Breath You Take by the Police, but my favorite song to listen to when stalking someone is definitely Private Eyes by Hall and Oates.

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

22nd Century

I would highly recommend that someone start a company called 22nd Century right now before all of a sudden it's the year 2100 and it's too late.

Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Recession Hits Prospective Perspective

I realize that posts on the Prospective Perspective have been less frequent in recent months. Please bear with us as we have been substantially impacted by the current recession. With revenues down, we have been forced to lay off most of our staff. And I have been hesitant to accept any federal bailout funds since that would curb my salary at $500,000.